You can’t help but laugh when you read these funny one-liners curated by the Hearfind review team.
“He who laughs last didn’t get the joke.” – Charles de Gaulle
“I always arrive late at the office, but I make up for it by leaving early.” – Charles Lamb
“Don’t worry about the world coming to an end today. It is already tomorrow in Australia.” – Charles M. Schulz
“By the time a man realizes that his father was right, he has a son who thinks he’s wrong.” – Charles Wadsworth
“A day without laughter is a day wasted.” – Charlie Chaplin
“Political correctness is tyranny with manners.” – Charlton Heston
“High heels were invented by a woman who had been kissed on the forehead.” – Christopher Morley
“If you love something set it free, but don’t be surprised if it comes back with herpes.” – Chuck Palahniuk
“When I was a boy I was told that anybody could become President. I’m beginning to believe it.” – Clarence Darrow
“Laughing at our mistakes can lengthen our own life. Laughing at someone else’s can shorten it.” – Cullen Hightower
“If you can’t live without me, why aren’t you dead already?” – Cynthia Heimel
“If you think you are too small to make a difference, try sleeping with a mosquito.” – Dalai Lama
“Remember, today is the tomorrow you worried about yesterday.” – Dale Carnegie
“Education is learning what you didn’t even know you didn’t know.” – Daniel J. Boorstin
“It is a scientific fact that your body will not absorb cholesterol if you take it from another person’s plate.” – Dave Barry
“Never under any circumstances take a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night.” – Dave Barry
“I used to jog but the ice cubes kept falling out of my glass.” – David Lee Roth
“Everyone has a purpose in life. Perhaps yours is watching television.” – David Letterman
“The digital camera is a great invention because it allows us to reminisce. Instantly.” – Demetri Martin
“A failure is like fertilizer; it stinks to be sure, but it makes things grow faster in the future.” – Denis Waitley
“Biologically speaking, if something bites you it’s more likely to be female.” – Desmond Morris
For plenty of great humour to put a smile on your face, check out Hearfind.
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